The following is a brief compilation of things I am bad at.
- Video games. My eye-hand coordination rivals that of a dust mite.
- Cooking. I once dumped an entire bag of flour into a pan of alfredo sauce. It was an accident, but still.
- Athletics. See #1. Dust mites once beat me in a game of dodgeball.
- Mingling. Social butterfly I am not.
- Geography. Don’t ask me where a foreign country is located on a globe. I have family members (coughmomcoughbrother) who have the world memorized, or something. I sit by and try to look intelligent. And clean up stray dust mites.
- Hanging things on walls. I have the HARDEST TIME figuring out what to fill empty space with. Dust mites don’t count. Take this exploding butterfly cut-out thingy, for example. (And add “Aptly and cleverly naming new projects” as #7 on the list of things I am bad at.)
Its predecessor, this Mayan relic, hung sideways on the living room wall for a good 6 weeks before I replaced it with the above butterfly explosion thingy. Family members who know things about geography questioned my decision-making and added “eyesight” to their mental lists of skill sets I am lacking.
The process of actually replacing the Mayan relic was simple once I figured out what to do. I used my Cricut and Sure Cuts a Lot to cut out a bunch of butterflies in varying shapes and sizes and colors, then glued them all down in an exploding-ish pattern.
The frame itself was $20 at Goodwill. I know how expensive large frames can be, so I bought two. The other one is hanging on the other side of the living room. Yes, it is also sideways, and yes, it also features desert pottery. I read somewhere that desert pottery looks better sideways. And now you read it somewhere, too, so it’s definitely a fact.
This whole project was inspired by this sculpture I found while browsing Pinterest. The butterflies are made out of recycled beer cans, people.
I’d have made mine out of beer cans myself but, whaddya know, we were fresh out of beer cans. And tin-smithing is #8 on the list of things I am bad at.
What are your self-professed non-talents? Any great ideas for what to fill the other frame with? Can you think of a better name for this project?