It’s been a while since I pulled together some of the zany keyword searches that land people on my blog, and since their sheer weirdness makes me laugh, I thought I’d share some more with you. Read on to see if you can figure out how searches for tiny black pool fish, medical spas, and butts cause Google to say “RIGHT HERE! VISIT ERIN! THE ONE WITH THE CATS AND THE FISH AND THE BUTTS! YES, HER!”
Ahem. What will I do if my students ever discover this blog? My projected image of partial sanity will be forever destroyed.
the couple who had ‘Black and White’ twins… twice
Say what? I’ve given birth? To “Black and White” twins? (What does that even mean?) You’d think I’d remember something like that, especially since it happened “…twice.” Dramatic ellipses for effect.
examples of blank floor plans for medical spa
You’re in the right spot! Except…not.
tiny black fishes that swim in in ground pools
A relaxing inner tube…an ice-cold glass glass of lemonade…a gang of tiny black fish slithering around my ankles. Yes. Sign me up. Maybe that medical spa should consider this?
man lampshade dancing table underwear
This person was clearly looking for Bachelorette Parties-R-Us. The lampshade probably costs extra.
singing at the top of my lungs while waiting for some dork
That dork is probably busy. Busy dancing on a table in his underwear.
i inspire my smile from nature
How very zen of you.
cat sign welcome to our bathroom hope you survive
Survival is always questionable in our bathroom. Particularly after a fibrous meal. How the cats fit into that, I’m not sure.
butt background
You know, I’m not really feeling the current background of this blog….would any of you be offended?
i bought a rug
Congratulations?
justin bieber printable
If I were to actually make a Bieber printable, who would want a copy? I know my little sister would snatch up several. (Hi, Beez.) ;)
cat condo made from a dresser
BRILLIANT. I like the way you think. Something like this?
Okay. Be honest. It’s one of YOU searching for these crazy things, right, just because you know I like silly keyword stats? Confess, please. You’re going to pop up someday and go APRIL FOOLS and spray me with silly string or something, right? Because seriously. Seriously! “Black and White” twins? Dancing lampshade men? What is this world coming to?
On a happily unrelated note, it’s supposed to be close to 60 degrees here today! I am so ready for spring. Spring=sundresses and spray painting. And now that I mentioned that, the next person to search for “stringing spring twins” or “painting spray-on dresses” will surely find themselves on this page. Welcome.
Busted. It was totally me.
ReplyDeleteWho am I kidding? I could never make up anything this good. But I think I'll start just to mess with you.
I love that spring means sundresses and spray painting to you also!
Well, searching "cats and fish and butts" was originally how I got to your blog (hahah, just kidding!). I love those random search comments that show up - they're always so funny!
ReplyDeleteYou have exceeded my expectations today. Forget it. I'm not posting. How can one compete with this dose of hilarity. ;)
ReplyDeleteYou need to do stand-up.
OMGoodness! You're killing me.
Where do you come up with this stuff? (Or am I asking the wrong person? Lol.) Wow. People are....are...........there ARE no words.
haha--not a single person who knows me in real life would recommend stand-up. I'm better at the sit-down writing thing. ;)
DeleteWell, you are a cat lady like me so I was clearly looking for a cat condo made from a dresser. Sorry.
ReplyDeleteHoly crap those are amazing! What on earth are these people looking for? Sadly, I don't have many gems. My favorite one ever was "Why does my cat look like a Lemur?"...I have a lemur looking cat named Lemur but I have no advice to someone trying to find out why theirs looks like one too.
Hahaha! People are so weird! And I'm so glad you write these posts. It's a nice dose of hilarity to my work day :)
ReplyDeleteYou had me laughing out load. So funny! Where do you find the google searches? I'm fairly technically illiterate... it's GREAT that I decided to start a blog and then figure things out. It works out so well that way. NOT! (ha I don't think I've said NOT! since high school... I think I'm going to bring it back).
ReplyDeleteDo you have any sort of stat counter attached to your blog? That's where I find mine. Blogger has a built-in stats page, but I don’t think your blog is powered by blogger powered? I mean, your blog IS powered by blogger….NOT! lol. ;)
DeleteLOL! I love those random searches! Never thought about posting about it though- very funny!
ReplyDeleteOh you SILLY GOOGLE, you! (I'm kind of worried about tiny black fishes in inground pools now. Is that a real thing?!)
ReplyDeleteHmm... some of my better ones of late...
ReplyDelete"foods that make you say eww:" This one just makes me sad. I like my recipes.
"how to say mardi gras in french:" This one also makes me sad for a completely different reason.
"husband too tall for fiat:" Why, yes. My husband is too tall for a fiat.
"what is sex risotto?" I don't know...
I love when you do this because it reminds me to go look at mine (also I enjoy laughing out loud in my cube and making all my stuffy fellow engineers squirm).
Okay, it's possible that I was dreaming but I do recall catching just the teeniest glimpse on tv somewhere about the black & white twins???!!! Am I crazy? Now I'm going to be googling this:(
ReplyDeleteBwaaahahaa!! Butt background. Can you imagine? Epic.
ReplyDeleteThis is cracking me up, I had to go look at mine - not near as hysterical as yours though. Best as of late: "that crazy picture that always makes me laugh." Seriously? Someone googled that? And then got my site. Haha! Who knows?
ReplyDeleteOkay. You got me. It was me who searched "singing at the top of my lungs while waiting for some dork" and found your blog :)
ReplyDeleteLove these posts.
Okay. You got me. It was me who searched "singing at the top of my lungs while waiting for some dork" and found your blog :)
ReplyDeleteLove these posts.
Depending on whose butt it was, that background could keep people coming back for more. If you go for it I'd like to put in a request for David Beckham's. :)
ReplyDelete